Monday, January 6, 2014

Distinct lack of motivation, but doing it anyways.

You know, I've been looking around at everyone else's resolutions and goals for 2014, and I keep feeling this pressure to find my own a little faster, but the truth is that I just.. haven't narrowed them down yet. Maybe I haven't given them the thought of day they deserve, but I've been trying really hard to manage other aspects of my life that popped up without any warning. Sigh.

I was hoping to have said aspects dealt with by the time school started again on Monday, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen, sadly. But, in good news, I stepped on the scale yesterday, and despite all of the stress (and the not-so-great eating), I registered a loss. =) That always makes me happy.

.5lb loss. Half a pound is still half a pound.

Anyways, there are a few that I've narrowed down, so I figured I'd post them while I'm actually of the mind to remember what, exactly, they were.

I'd like to eat less processed food and start actually cooking more at home. This way, at least I'll know what's going into our food and can control it a little better - and it'll save money!

Speaking of money, I want to be more financially frugal. I want to consider what I'm spending money on. Can I really afford this? Do I really need it? Why do I want it in the first place, and probably one of the most important things at this point - do I have ROOM for it in my apartment? Haha. Such a small living space, already crammed full as is!

One of the goals I struggle with the most (aside from money these days, of course) is drinking water. I used to be exceptional at this, but I'm not sure what happened. Maybe if I mix it up and flavor my water naturally throughout the day (though not always - I tend to just enjoy cold water, plain), it'll help some. I don't know, but it sure would be nice.

Perhaps a bit generically, I want to learn to love myself. I don't know when I started to hate myself as a whole, but I think that it's not healthy and it's not helping me in my life whatsoever. I need to love me before I can truly love anybody else (at least, in a healthy way - emotionally, I can feel it most of the time, but I don't think I love fairly when I feel like I can't measure up. If that makes sense?)

I'd like to work on my relationship - seriously. I have a lot of books to read on true expectations for relationships and how to fix relationships post-affair, etc. I'll probably write about my thoughts on this stuff, too, as I go through them.

Annnnd, that's all I can think of for right now.

My mini goal for the moment: Lose 10% of my weight by the end of April or so, give or take. Loose deadline. However, I'd really like to be in the 200's by my birthday, which is in 6 weeks. That gives me some time to lose the 11.7, at the very least. I can do that. =)

Here's my first progress picture of the year. I'm hoping to see progress by the beginning of next year.

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